
We lost our daughter Jane on February 17th of this year and really weren't expecting to conceive so quickly. We were surprised and thrilled, and so, so grateful.
I am due March 12th, 2015 and am 17 weeks today. :)
I was very ill this time with severe morning sickness called hyperemesis gravidarum that has already subsided, glory to God! I had HG with all four that have been born alive and no nausea at all with our two born to heaven. I don't subscribe to the idea that morning sickness is THE sign of a healthy pregnancy. Many, including my mother, never had it! But I cannot deny the hope that swelled in me for this tiny life when I started to get sick really early on.
The last time I saw one of my children on an ultrasound screen... she was dead and misshapen and breath failed me. I was so nervous walking back into that same room where we were told how sorry they were just a few months ago for my 10 week "dating ultrasound." The hard-labor preacher and I both cried and smiled big smiles as we watched this one alive, heart beating, fluids wooshing, limbs wiggling.
Baby D started moving where I could feel them about 3 weeks ago. I hadn't ever felt Jane move before she died, so I realized with these first movements that my soul had been waiting 7 months to feel life move in my womb. With every little flutter, kisses to my soul. :)
I will begin to write more about this sacred dance journey between grief and joy that is a rainbow pregnancy. It's important. Thank you, friends, for walking through this time in support and for being excited with us about this new life. :)
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